Put down that bag of chips Barbie!

So last night while watching the season finale of Hell’s Kitchen (Dave won! Hooray!) I saw a teaser for the evening news that “Barbie was too fat for designers.” This both intrigued and infuriated me. Barbie was always the ideal woman in my eyes. I learned how to sew by making clothes for Barbie to model during our fashion shows as a child.

It must have been the break-up with Ken. I always gained weight after a break-up.

Apparently the designer in question is Mr. Red Soles Christian Louboutin. He thinks “her ankles are too fat.” Really Barbie has cankles?

Then in my research I came across another recent quote from designer Karl Lagerfeld. "No one wants to see curvy women." He said "you've got fat mothers with their bags of chips sitting in front of the television and saying that thin models are ugly."

Are you freaking kidding me? For the record Mr. Lagerfeld, this fat mother was eating a bag of popcorn in front of the TV last night!

Not that I would recognize either of these two gentlemen if they were walking down the street, but…

I vow that if I were to come across either of these two jerks and the opportunity presented itself I’d sit on them with my big fat ass and make them apologize to Barbie.

And Barbie- For the record I think you’re beautiful just the way you are.